Sportparents and their children

Sport parents you are everything to your children but…..
It was during those days that players were showing displeasure for not getting parents support and encouragement morally and financially. Sport then was never considered a career option. So many a promising careers was nipped in the bud, to pursue professional education. It was especially so in India, but not anymore with the Indian economy improving many folds, more and more sponsors are coming forward to use sport as a medium to promote their business. The present scenario has encouraged parent to consider sport as a career option. Steady increase in family income's of even the middle class society has changed the outlook of parents regarding the participation of their children in competitive sport and physical activity.
The reason's why parents encourage children to take to sport and physical activity are:
1. To keep the children physically active and healthy.
2. For social interaction and to make friends.
3. For fun and enjoyment.
4. Professional sport may give children name, fame and money.
5. To build sporting and competitive spirit.
6. To fulfill their own unmet needs through their children.
7. To see pride in their child's achievements.
In the guise of helping and supporting their children parents get unknowingly over involved in their activities which can do a lot of harm to the child's prospects.
It is easy to blame the parents, but we should also empathize with them because they sacrifice a lot of their time, energy and money. when a child is
born a parent does not come with an instruction manual on how to do sport parenting.

Some of the common negative parental behavior's are.
1. They are too pushy with their children [even though a little push is required
When they have to bring them out of the bed and send them to practice etc.]
2. Having too high unrealistic expectations in performance.
3. Encouraging children to be too aggressive and have do-it-at- all- cost attitude.
4. Discuss elder's issues about other parents in front of children
5. Punish children when they lose by abusing them verbally, punishing them physically, or not speaking to them.
6. In the interest of the child use unethical means like, doing favors to the coaches, referees, administrators. Making adjustments in ties and fixtures etc
7. Coaching from the side lines with little knowledge of the game.
8. Having endless discussions at home regarding defeats, and ways of winning.
9. Comparing with other successful players.
10. Not giving unconditional love.
How can parents be supportive to their children?
[1]Encourage the child to take sport as an enjoyable activity, tell them about the other advantage s of playing sport like * sporting behavior and attitude* good diversion from other unfavorable activities *about healthy mind in a healthy body.*decision making and improvement in self confidence.
[2] Motivate them whenever necessary.
[3] Have realistic goals and expectations about the wards' performance.
[4] Let the child know that improvement in performance is more important than results.
[5] Have faith in the system like coaches, administrators and others.
[6] Never meddle with the coach's tactics and methods give him a free hand.
[7] Realize that sport is not everything in life and not be taken too seriously.
[8] There is always a role of destiny at work so accept whatever happens on and off the field.
[9] support sporting activity because playing sport has advantages that spread to other areas of life and acts like a 'personality development programme'
And helps improve friendships, relationships, education and career.
[10] Always enjoy seeing your ward play without emphasis on the end result.
[11] Every child is different, do not compare, but give unconditional love.
In my experience as a player, sport parent, and sport mentor I have come across many parents abusing the children physically and verbally in front of others, this is harmful and should be stopped immediately.
*case study:
A 13 year old sport child was referred to me, after I sat in conversation with the boy I realized that the mother of the boy was pressurizing him too much and had very high expectation's about his performance .She used to beat and abuse him when he didn't perform well. This led to the boy being too result oriented and always began to brood about the same to prove himself. After which he was taught to focus on the play, concentrate about the present and forget about the external factors till he got the result, he is able to produce results and is happier these days.
……….Be aware of what you are doing to the child.

Your sport counselor /mentor
Mn viswanath
mnvnath@yahoo.com